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Somewhere, at some point, a married pair of auctioneers have had an amazing argument.

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There should be a holiday for people who work the holidays .

If I was to run NASA I’d make all ground crew dress like apes whenever Astronauts returned to Earth.

I wish my wallet came with free refills.

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It’s an unspoken law that whenever a giant boulder is barreling towards someone in a movie, they have to run in a straight line instead of getting out of the way.

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it is perfectly fine to eat fries with ketchup but an absolute hate crime to put ketchup on mashed potatoes.

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