mission vending Posted May 14, 2010 Share Posted May 14, 2010 Got this from a friend today, thought I'd pass it along..... 1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die. 2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong. 3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. 4. There is great need for a sarcasm font. 5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet? 6. Was learning cursive really necessary? 7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood. 8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died. 9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired. 10. Bad decisions make good stories. 11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day. 12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again. 13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes when I know I didn't make any changes. 14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this - ever. 15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away? 16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste. 17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call. 18. Why do I have to learn how to use a cell phone all over again when I upgrade to the latest and greatest model? 19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay. 20. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option. 21. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it. 22. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in. 23. I sometimes use my cell phone to call my kids instead of just walking up the stairs to talk to them. 24. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger. 25. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said? 26. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters! 27. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever. 28. Is it just me or do they just give out driver's licenses to anyone who wants one? 29. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far. 30. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists. I hope I haven't offended anyone. You just can never tell what they are going to do next. 31. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is. 32. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time! 33. The older I get, the more I mess up the lyrics to popular songs on the radio. 34. I think IPODs were invented so that teenagers could completely ignore the world around them. Take them off every now and then, kids. There's a whole world of sound out there! 35. Who thought that bootcamps at 6:00am was a good idea? For that matter, why do I need to go to bootcamp? I'm not in the army. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snack dude Posted May 15, 2010 Share Posted May 15, 2010 Thanks mission there are some good ones in there Just remember " unbreakable parts will, interchanable parts wont" "You know your in trouble when your house, car, wife, and girlfriend are all 3 months late" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JEREMYTINA Posted May 15, 2010 Share Posted May 15, 2010 I completely agree with number 2 and number 4. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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